Newsbreaks--2.11/2.12.07

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The U.S. Military is claiming that the government of Iran is arming insurgent militias in Iraq, raising the question of whether the war is widening. Now maybe it's me, but the idea of invading Iran to fix Iraq seems like trying to fix your marriage by having an affair.

Harvard University named its first female President Sunday. When told of the news, former President Lawrence Summers said, "Tell her there's a calculator in the desk if she needs one."

North Dakotans living in sin can rest a little easier, after their State Senate passed a bill downgrading cohabitation from a sex crime to merely fraud. Then the Senate passed another law which changed the state's calendars from 1850 to 1950.

Arkansas lawmakers have rejected a plan to honor Revolutionary War figure Thomas Paine, after some objected to Paine's writings. ""He did some good things for the nation, but the book that he wrote was anti-Christian and anti-Jewish," said one lawmaker. "I mean, it'd be totally different if he'd just owned a couple of slaves."

A human rights organization is claiming that real-life interrogators in Iraq are taking cues from what they see on American TV. One soldier, speaking anonymously, agreed, saying, "The stuff on '24' is useful, but it doesn't always work. Sometimes we have to go all 'American Idol.'"